How should a family mediator be chosen?

Divorce is a legal process, so we believe that it’s  usually best if the mediator is an attorney who has experience presenting parties for divorce for several reasons:

• The law is complex, with many different possibilities. An attorney will have the depth of experience to provide you with more options, better options, to resolve your divorce.

• The law is constantly changing. An attorney will be aware of these changes.

It is important to be comfortable with your mediator, we suggest you learn the following:

• Find out how many cases they have mediated and over what time period. It takes experience, perhaps even hundreds of cases before a mediator is truly effective.

• Ask them about their mediation training. Have they only had the basic training?

• Find a mediator who has made a commitment to work on their mediation skills, not just their litigation skills. As we mentioned above, it’s wise to choose a mediator that has litigated, but you really want someone committed and focused on being a mediator.

• Find out if they have training as a transformative mediator. A transformative mediator may transform the relationships between the spouses.

• Finally, find out if the mediator has special training to work with high conflict individuals, and/or personality disorders.